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Not so Much Punishment
#11
Hi Kimmi
 
It different for them to do surgery without living a year as a woman though I can see if the person is IS different rules apply,  I think that like me real life had to go on and her and I finish out school. Though throughout this time she pushed girl time more once I started doing it, so I can see why her mum might as well, though it seems like she was disposed to it.
I found out I had a womb removed two years ago and about the surgeries, They tried HRT on me and the effects were profound changed my life while my face will never be totally femme compared to how it would have looked if testosterone was never given to me with longer hair and some makeup I do have a feminine face.
My insurance company would not cover medical because in their view it was a pre-existing condition from birth. I found by playing the Trans card got instant access to public services as like everything else in Ireland there were scandals in the past. In 2001 I had surgery on my genitals to remove growths and had some chemo after it, since stating HRT it seems I am more predisposed to cancer risks and on a scan I had lumps back down there. Given I am older now and the body does not heal as well as it did when I was 30, I was given the option of removal as the area is a spongy mass and if parts of the tumours get into the blood stream and lodge elsewhere I would be in a lot of trouble, they wanted to remove the root and spongy mass not that there was a lot and move my urethra down they gave me the option of reconstruction in about 12 months but to be honest I did not want more healing just wanted it over, Being “trans” I was also given the option of a vagina and ironically most of it was there already though there is a sealed up cervix there which may need to be removed because of cancer risks, when I went in at 17 and had my “appendix” out my current team feel that I may have had an infection in the womb or vaginal passage to the inability to flush blood, their view was that the Testosterone injections were stopping the process but it was un natural to be totally sealed, this was obviously corrected at that time but took away whatever HRT production I had which then in time went on to cause health issues. I started dressing and presenting as a woman because that what my health service expected and it kind of grew from there, being in the EU I could access services in the UK which were able to deal with Trans people there, Ireland does not do GRS. I felt that I would have a better outcome in the UK so played that card. I feel that it has been a struggle with the hospital here as they are not honest, trying to obtain medical records was impossible until I was on the verge of court my early records were “lost” being adopted I have no family history either so it’s a right mess, I started living more and more as a woman after the surgery because it just seemed easier first of all I have a flat under carriage and secondly I have boobs. Initially I though well I could have a mastectomy in 24 -36 months as the very notion of boobs upset me, but now they are there and I have gotton used to them as it’s my body that produced them, My hang-ups of presenting as a woman are mostly gone because I felt the need to do it rather than being told to do it if that makes sense.
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#12
Karen, It makes complete sense.

And I sense this likely is the real you, even if you didn't have the opportunity to find out growing up.

My friend went into her surgeries eyes wide open. It's a shame you had no idea what was happening to you and why you were being transitioned into a female.

I am glad you are most of the way there presenting as a woman now. It took a lifetime and not of your making.

Kimmi
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#13
I think there is a mix of me there, and I think had it been today there would be less emphases on being male or female but then it was very ridgit and there were expectations from society, as in girls did one thing boys did another, boys were expected to be farmers or trades people girls were expected to keep house or type letters, was it right or wrong who knows but its the way it was, My issue was loosing my freedom in my mind and being pushed into a role, was the role bad one i was in it no, for two reasons there was no going back at that point and the fact that I started at a new school almost validated it to an extent.

Now I am happy been able to chose and its just fair easier to say I am transgendered rather than going into the whole intersexed story.

Though I am intrigued how many boys were dressed a kids and teens, One would wonder did it have a effect mentally on them.

Though now gender is so fluid and what we might have considered sissy in the past is now seen as almost normal which is great why should girls have all the nice things.
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#14
Karen, I so agree!

I am glad that being a "sissy" (whatever that means) is no longer demonized as it once was.

I understand why transgendered works better for you- intersexed is still not very well known, much less understood.

Now that you have chosen your path, I just like to think of you as female, and more importantly, as friend.

Kimmi
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#15
Thank you Kimmi,

It is what it is, and I wish I could do it over, but we are here and alive and a future,
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#16
What a lovely, thoughtful thread.

Welcome, Karen. I hope you enjoy the forum. x
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#17
(08-06-2019, 04:27 PM)Ali Wrote: What a lovely, thoughtful thread.

Welcome, Karen. I hope you enjoy the forum. x

Thank you Ali,

And thank the forum for having me.

I feel a sense of release by saying it so thanks all for putting up with me and Kim.

K
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