Firstly please let me say thank you to Michele who contacted me though my own website to invite me to contribute here at petticoated.com.
Secondly allow me to introduce myself as this is my first contribution to petticoated.com. I use the 'nom-de-plume' Lady A or Lady Alexa online since our families and friends are unaware of our lifestyle, although we believe they suspect that something is not quite as vanilla as it might appear on the surface. We have met some other couples who live the lifestyle and attend the occasional femdom event and these people know my real name.
Anyway in my first letter to you I wanted to discuss my own reasons and opinions on what is commonly called forced feminisation, petticoat punishment and female led relationships. I've enjoyed reading the letters and forums your website as they all chime nicely with my own views on the subject.
My decision to feminise my husband came about gradually over a period of time and grew out of a cross-dressing bedroom game a few years ago. The first fallacy I often read about on other sites is the one that the feminised husband or partner is already submissive and maybe effeminate. My own husband, now called Alice, is indeed slim but also six foot, broad-shouldered and slightly balding. He was very comfortable with responsibility and very independent minded. This of course led to some challenges for me once I went down the route of feminising him and, to be honest, it still does. However, my own success shows that when we as women decide to petticoat and feminise our men then it's very do-able no matter what your target male is like initially.
The other point I want to make is that our marriage is very normal aside from the fact that the person who was my husband is now effectively my housewife. We do live now in a Female Led Relationship but that really doesn't mean I just tell Alice what to do all the time. No I consult with her and make decisions based on her input or sometimes we will do something she would like as that's fine too. That said, I do enforce regular discipline as the pecking order does need to be maintained.
I don't really like the term 'forced feminisation' since it implies something that is uncomfortable for the recipient as it was forced on them against their will. I use the term 'encouraged feminisation' as this is a better description of what I have done to Alice. I persuaded, encouraged and coaxed him to become a girl. I don't use petticoating as a punishment as I want Alice's petticoating to be accepted as a loving gift from me not a punishment. I have other ways to achieve punishment.
The decision to petticoat and feminise my husband came about because I noticed the changes in him when we were playing at cross-dressing as part of our bedroom games. He became more gentle, more submissive, more caring and more thoughtful. It really worked and I wanted more. Alice's whole demeanour changed when petticoated. That said it was me who instigated cross-dressing as a bedroom game I do have to admit although l didn't expect it to then morph into what we have now.
So where are we? Alice only wears skirts or dresses in the home, no male clothing or trousers are permitted (unless we have visitors). Unfortunately with society as it is, Alice has to wear male clothing outside the home albeit with knickers, bra and stockings underneath. I only use her female name ever and I also refer to her with female pronouns or girl as in "good girl" etc. I use this at all times but if we are with anyone I change to 'dear' or 'darling'. I have noticed that no one seems to notice when I call her Alice or girl in the street, pub, shops or restaurants. Either that or they pretend to not notice. The same with her body hair which has mostly been shaved off (except for the triangle you-know-where and her lower arms). We use the gym, swimming pool or the beach and nobody seems to even notice that Alice has perfectly smooth legs and chest.
Where would I like to take it? The benefits of a feminised petticoated man cannot be underestimated and this is now how we live our daily life. Whilst I am very happy to have Alice as she is now and she is comfortable and accepting of her lifestyle, I have to be honest that I want a bit more. Those who read my blog know I want her to have pierced ears; clip-ons are just not the same. She is worried that our family would see the holes so I just can't get her to do it, a good example of that strong-willed independent streak that hasn't quite disappeared. I also want her to have manicured nails, I think something plain would work but getting her to a place is proving difficult. I also want to feminise her outside clothing, maybe blouses and female trousers? The problem is that once she goes outside in male clothing, the male side then starts to kick back. I then sometimes have to remind her to put a skirt on when we get home and overcome the 'in a minutes' and 'it's late' and so on.
Any advice on my next stages would be welcomed. I can understand Alice's reticence in showing herself as Alice to a wider audience as, although I think she looks lovely, her height, shoulders and strong face provide an obvious reminder of her past life as a man.
In the meantime thank you for giving me the opportunity to download my views on life with a devoted and petticoated feminised husband.
Thank you for your letter Lady A. Each of us approaches this lifestyle differently and your decision to petticoat him with gentle coaxing has worked wonderfully, so far. Perhaps some regular punishment session, say once a week, to remind her of her errors, your expectations and that if she continues to delay, forget, or makes excuses there are consequences.
Many men today have pierced ears so that could be done soon, I appreciate the go slow approach, at first, but now you are down the road some and it seems to me its time to step up the pressure.