from Terry

Dear Auntie Helga,

My name is Terry, I'm a 55 y/o male, and have been an ardent reader of PDQ since 2005, I love the stories, so I can relate to some I find so fictional that it makes me wonder at times. I'm not really writing you my story, this is more about a decision I made when I was in 5th grade some 40 odd years ago.

I had a friend that lived in the same apartment building as me, I was a year older then she was. One afternoon after school she invited me to her house to hang out for a few hours, watch TV talk, etc. Back then as today both parents had to work just to make ends meet, so there was never any kind of parental supervision.

When I came into her house she said she'd be right back and disappeared into her bedroom as I sat in the living room looking down the hallway where she went. She came out of her bedroom wearing nothing but a black short sleeve leotard, I looked at her, I had never seen anything like this before in my life. I remember this moment like it was yesterday, the hairs on my neck stood up, I was caught in a moment of time like a deer looking into a cars headlights, I remember my head getting really warm and sweating when I saw her. She must have read me like a book, knowing the exact thought in my mind; she said to me, "would you like to try it on?" I think I turned even a deeper shade of red when I heard those words. She knew I so wanted to try it on, but what came out of my mouth was not the words I really wanted to say, what came out was "no thanks". So she went off to the bathroom and changed into play cloths. As I said, that day, that one single moment in time has been with me like for all these years.

Because of that event I became fascinated with owning, wearing a leotard like my friend was wearing, and to this day that feeling has never changed. Am I a cross dresser, I do not know, just because I like to wear certain types of woman's cloths, what does that make me, or does it really matter. No, it doesn't make a bit of difference.

The reason I'm writing you this is fairly simple, you are a highly intelligent woman, you know the psyche of males, young and old. My question can't really be answered, I know this, but if there is anyone who could possibly come up with any type of answer, it would be you. The question is simple, back some 40 plus odd years ago, how would my life had been different if I had said yes to that single question. I wonder about that, and so wish I had said "Yes" instead of the embarrassing "No" that I said.

My friend knew how much I wanted to try her leotard on, but as a male, I would not, could not say what was really in my heart, as you know it's a male ego thing. Maybe things have changed, maybe if I was that same young boy being asked in 2013 and not in 1972 my answer could have been the correct one for me at the time. Maybe not, the male ego is such a fragile thing.

Thank you for your time in reading my letter, maybe there can be a discussion about young male ego's and how small decisions made can effect there future.


Thank you for your letter Terry and for being a loyal reader. We all make mistakes we regret later in life and even though you did not take advantage of the opportunity you may now explore these feelings to their fullest. No matter which way we choose to go, each decision leads us down a different path, would this have changed things? Probably, how? Who knows but by providing your story you may have influenced someone else to make a different choice in a similar situation.

Auntie Helga

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Letter 10