from Shelly

Dear Helga,

My son has gynecomastia and currently wears a bra for support. He is 11 years old and has been wearing one for about 3 months. Other issues include discomfort around his testicles and sore nipples, caused when sleeping in his pyjamas. As a caring mother I would like him to wear girls soft cotton knickers to offer a better material to ease his discomfort. I would also like him to wear a soft cotton nightie to bed, offering the right shape garment for his breasts, and again in a softer material.

Whilst I know that this approach may be viewed as odd, I do feel that it is not, and my son could benefit. Unlike the mothers on various Forums, you have had experience in using girls clothes for boys. I am a single mother and just need a view on my intentions. What I would like to know is what the likely effect would be, psychologically.

Your comments would be welcome.


Thank you for your letter Shelly. I would be delighted to help however I can. I have had a few other mothers with sons with this condition and it seems that not only are their son's breasts effected but a sensitivity to rough fabric occasionally occurs as well.

I understand your desire to make him as comfortable as possible and your concern for the long term effect of wearing girl's clothes and though everybody is different of course and your son will react in his own way, how you handle this will make the largest impact. He looks to you not only for guidance and support but love and understanding as well and if you show doubts about these changes, he could respond negatively. In other words, your positive approach is critical, you have him wearing a bra already, and that is a large hurdle, knickers and nighties shouldn't be that much change.

I would be happy to discuss the matter further if you wish, we could discuss some possible ways to implement these additions to his wardrobe.


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