from Anita

Dear Helga,

I don't know whether you can help me with my son or not however with the number of male maids on your website I think I am closer than ever before.

This all started when my son was four years old on a family vacation. We stayed in a hotel like most people do which is when my son saw his first maid. They say when we are young it is easy to have thoughts remain with us for the rest of our lives. In the case here that is what happened to my son without my knowledge. Months later when we were out some place someone would ask Davey what he wanted to be when he got older. The first time I heard him say a maid working at a big hotel I like others laughed. Well it wasn't as funny as it sounded with Davey always wanting to be a maid. One day I sat with him to find out where this maid idea came from and to explain he was a boy and only girls could be maids. Davey just looked at me telling me not to be so silly since he was going to be a maid someday. I thought kids change their minds all the time and not to make a big deal about it.

As time went on Davey would ask if he could learn how to vacuum and make beds which I thought was good for him to learn. I wasn't thinking of his maid comments but he was wanting to learn what maids do. On his tenth birthday Davey asked me to buy him a maid uniform letting me know the maid dream was very much alive with Davey. I explained maid uniforms were for women and he was a boy therefore they didn't make a maid uniform to fit him. He wasn't happy having his heart set on a life as a maid.

Now Helga next week will be Davey's thirteenth birthday. He has already told how much he has grown since last year. Somehow he took his measurements and knows what size maid uniform will fit him. What am I supposed to do Helga? I have a son who has wanted to be a maid since age five without ever changing his mind. Davey is well aware only women become maids wearing maid uniforms. He no interest in doing anything else at a hotel and wants me to train him how to be a maid. I showed him pictures of all types of maids pointing out all were women, all wore women's shoes and pantyhose. The more I tried to let him know boys don't wear women's clothes even if it is a maids uniform the more determined he was with me.

Finally I thought okay let's just see what Davey is willing to do. I sat with him once again while he showed me pictures of the maid uniform he wanted. He watched me write down then went on to show me the shoes, color or pantyhose and kind of bra he wanted to wear. I'm looking at my twelve almost thirteen year old describe in detail the women's clothes he wanted me to buy and he wanted to wear. It was then I had to seek help which is why I am here today Helga.

Is this normal activity for a young boy? Have you seen other boys want to have a woman's career or job?

I'm confused. Can you help me with this one?


Thank you for your letter Anita. I suppose his fascination with maids might be a little off the usual path but it obviously triggered something in him when he was young and impressionable, its there now and dealing with it positively seems appropriate.

Personally I don't see a problem with him exploring this career and it may be that he has a real aptitude for it and love the work. When we are that age we explore, we experiment as we discover who we are, we put away the little toys and start to evolve and mature, we also make plenty of mistakes along the way but only by trying things do we learn. He is not alone, at least if you go by the many emails I receive from boys wishing to explore their feminine side.

I suggest that you not only allow this but encourage him to explore all aspects of it including the underwear, and of course the work a maid does and keep him busy, you would in effect be his employer.


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