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Dear Auntie Helga, I have recently discovered your online magazine and think it is wonderful. Having read through it I can identify with some of the letters. Therefore I thought you would be interested in my experiences as a child and teenager at the hands of my grandmother. It started when I was about 7 years old. I was staying at my grandmother's house, whilst my parents moved house, and I fell ill with a virus. This meant I was confined to bed, and was suffering from chills. My grandmother gave me some bedsocks to wear, previously belonging to my aunt and they were pink lacy nylon. At the time I thought nothing of it, I was too ill to be bothered. They helped to warm my feet so I was happy for that. However, the next day I needed to change pyjamas and of course only had one pair with me. I ended up in a pair of my aunt's which were a matching set with the bedsocks and included a housecoat too. I remember feeling a little self conscious with the whole lot on, especially when I was well enough to get up and venture downstairs for a meal with my grandfather present. This episode must have triggered something in me at the time, as I feel it led to my wearing female clothes later in life. I also think my grandmother actually enjoyed it, especially looking back as an adult and realising how she 'engineered' further episodes for me to wear girl's clothes. I should explain, although my aunt no longer lived at home, my grandmother had kept a lot of her old clothes, ranging from age 6/7 up to 17/18. During the following few years I ended up experiencing several of them. I often stayed with my grandparents during school holidays, sometimes for 2-3 weeks at a time. Often my grandmother would expose me to female clothing and underwear on purpose. For example, by asking for help fastening her bra or corset when dressing. She often commented on the feel of the fabric or cut of the garments at this time too. I'm convinced this was pre meditated now. Maybe some sort of softening up? If my own clothes were dirty from playing I would often end up with my aunt's socks or even trousers on while mine were washed. They would never dry quickly either. The socks were all mainly white knee socks with ribbed or patterned sides, obviously girls. The trousers were usually tight fitted pairs of stretch nylon, this being the seventies. The style was flared though so some were fairly unisex. I now realise that as the years went by, I was wearing more and more girl's things, and more often too. It came to be accepted as nearly normal for me to end up in some of my aunt's clothes every time I visited. I think I became slightly 'brainwashed' about it. I think it was made easier as it was usually confined to indoors, especially for the first few years. One particular stay was very memorable for me, and also I'm sure planned in advance by my grandmother. I was aged 10 at the time and due for a 2 week stay in October. My grandmother came to collect me, and conveniently helped pack my case. We then travelled to her house by bus, a good 2 hour journey. Neither she or my parents had a car back then. It transpired that she had 'forgotten' to pack any underwear for me. I only had the underpants, vest and socks I had travelled in. Needless to say, there were plenty of my aunt's I could wear instead. It was of course too far to travel back just to collect some, and why buy some when my aunt's old ones would do. Who is going to know was her final argument. For two weeks I wore matching sets of silky or nylon camisoles, vests and panties. It appeared my aunt never had plain white cotton underwear, just pink or pastel shades. Coupled with the inevitable wearing of socks too and some of her trousers and tee shirts I spent more time dressed in girl's clothes than not. I hope this is of interest, and would only be too happy to share more details if you would like. Yours D from the UK. Thank you for your letter D. Your grandmother gave you a wonderful gift, feminity, and I'm sure our readers would love to read further of your experiences. Auntie Helga |